I am a 21-year-old woman who is frightened by sexual intimacy. my issue does not stem from any history of sexual abuse. Rather, it is linked to my intrusive thoughts: the fear of being incompetent in bed, the fear of getting pregnant, or the fear of my partner not finding my body attractive. Due to these fears, I avoid relationships altogether. While I have engaged in some physical contact, anything beyond that terrifies me.
It’s important to understand that your problem extends beyond mere sexual disorder. Various psychological problems like anxiety, depression, phobias, obsessive-compulsive disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and certain personality disorders can significantly impact one’s ability to enjoy sex or be comfortable with intimacy. In order to overcome the fear you experience and be able to enjoy a fulfilling sexual relationship, it is crucial that you seek help for your broader psychological issues. You deserve both pleasure and emotional safety, not just in the realm of sex but also in your daily life.
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If you would like to seek advice from Pamela regarding your sexual concerns, please send us a brief description of your issues to [email protected] (please avoid sending attachments). Each week, Pamela selects one problem to address, which will be published online. Please note that she cannot engage in personal correspondence. All submissions are subject to our terms and conditions.
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