During dinner he mentioned wanting to use our pool. After more texts from him, we invited them over on a Sunday evening. The husband immediately went in to hug my son. My son gave him an uncomfortable side hug. My older son put out his hand for a handshake. The neighbor said, “Oh, a handshake, huh?” I never thought they’d come in expecting to hug our children!
A few weeks later he texted, asking my son to feed their dog while they were away. Our son had never been to their house before. We weren’t comfortable sending him by himself because of the hugging.
The neighbor seemed surprised I was with my son. He came in to hug me, and I offered a side squeeze and my son stuck his hand out for a handshake. Again, the neighbor commented that my son shook his hand instead of hugging him. I was proud of my son. And glad I didn’t send him alone.
While we were there, he asked my son for his cellphone number. I piped up: “You can call our landline number to ask our son to feed your dog.” He seemed surprised that I didn’t readily give him my son’s cell. I keep telling myself that these neighbors are just trying too hard, but we feel uncomfortable.
How can I be a kind neighbor but create space? My husband and I are jokingly telling each other we are ready to move. We would love to hear your thoughts, even if you feel I’m wrong.
No Hugs: I’m not there. You are. And while my instincts tell me that this neighbor is a pushy boundary crosser and close-hugger who doesn’t have children and is not used to dealing with families, I might not see actual danger residing next door.
What concerns me is that you would rather submit to unwanted sidewinder hugs from your neighbor than deal with him by expressing — out loud — how you and your family operate. You say, “Stan — I should have mentioned this before, but we’re not
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Denial of responsibility! Vigour Times is an automatic aggregator of Global media. In each content, the hyperlink to the primary source is specified. All trademarks belong to their rightful owners, and all materials to their authors. For any complaint, please reach us at – [email protected]. We will take necessary action within 24 hours.
