- My daughter consumes a combination of formula and breastmilk, for which I need to pump eight times a day.
- This means I have to carry my breast pump with me wherever I go.
- I’ve encountered strangers telling me not to pump in public multiple times.
As a first-time mom, I wasn’t aware of the amount of anxiety and worry I would experience in various aspects. Before making any decision, whether it’s selecting a shampoo or using a nail buffer on my daughter, I spend at least 30 minutes conducting thorough research on the internet.
When my baby turned six weeks old, my husband and I started going on longer outings, such as walks around the neighborhood or sit-down dinners at local restaurants. Since my baby is fed with a combination of breast milk and formula, I still need to pump six to eight times a day for around 15 to 25 minutes each session. This means I have to bring my breast pump along and use it wherever I am.
Initially, I sought privacy while pumping
Although there are discreet portable breast pumps available, I decided to use one with regular-sized flanges. When attached, it makes my chest appear quite noticeable. At first, I made an effort not to breast pump in public. I felt embarrassed by the way it looked and didn’t want to make others uncomfortable. I would find a bathroom, retreat to the car’s backseat, or even rush home, leaving my family behind. However, over time, pumping began to feel isolating, and considering the hours I spent doing it every day, I didn’t want it to disrupt my life.
I stopped hiding and started pumping in public. I would hook up the flanges inside my pumping bra, wear a shirt over it, and go about my day. I could walk around the park, sit at a restaurant, or even browse the mall while pumping. Occasionally, if my shirt wasn’t long enough, you could see the milk flowing into the bottles attached to the flanges.
A few months ago, a man approached me at a restaurant and asked me to stop pumping in public. He insisted I should use the nearby bathroom in a private stall. When I refused, he threatened to report me to the restaurant manager and security. Although the restaurant didn’t ask me to stop, there have been subsequent instances where people have approached me with similar remarks.
In those moments, I often find myself too stunned and nervous to respond. However, I wish I could gather myself and explain a few things to those who shame women for breastfeeding or pumping in public.
Feeding your baby is isolating
One of the ways I coped with early postpartum depression was by avoiding isolation. Taking my baby out and being around others significantly improved my mood during that challenging period. Pumping in public is the only way I can achieve that.
Postpartum women already deal with numerous private emotions and struggles, ranging from birth trauma to hormonal changes. Asking a woman to pump in a bathroom stall or the car’s backseat is isolating and unfair.
Producing breast milk to feed a baby is a natural process. If someone is offended by witnessing it in public, that shouldn’t be my concern. They should examine their own discomfort and understand why it affects them.
It’s time-consuming
Many people underestimate the time commitment of breast pumping. I spend three hours a day attached to a breast pump. Simultaneously, I work full-time and strive to remain socially active. If I were to isolate myself for pumping, it would consume a significant portion of my day, limiting my ability to complete essential tasks like grocery shopping or enjoying a long walk outside, which positively impacts my mental health.
Don’t watch if it makes you uncomfortable
I wish I could tell people to stop staring at me when I’m pumping in public, making them uncomfortable. My goal is not to seek attention; it’s simply to pump breast milk for my baby’s nourishment. If witnessing a woman attached to a breast pump in public makes someone feel uneasy, they should avert their gaze.
As a new mom, I already have a multitude of worries. I don’t need to consider the opinions of strangers who disapprove of me pumping while on the go.
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