Mental Health Experts Reveal Key Signs of Narcissism
In a society where the term “narcissist” is thrown around lightly, mental health experts urge caution. Recently, allegations surrounding Jada Pinkett Smith’s lack of empathy and self-obsession sparked social media chatter. However, therapists emphasize that a true narcissistic personality must meet strict criteria outlined by psychologists.
Jada made shocking revelations during a press blitz for her new memoir, disclosing that she and Will Smith had been secretly separated for seven years while maintaining a facade of unity to the public. New York-based personality disorder specialist, Alana Carvalho, explains that although presenting as a happily married family woman doesn’t necessarily indicate narcissism, it is common for individuals with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and narcissistic tendencies to lie to maintain appearances.
While it’s important to note that having narcissistic traits doesn’t equate to an NPD diagnosis, approximately 0.5 to 5 percent of the US population has been diagnosed with NPD. Jada’s troubled childhood in Baltimore, marked by violence and her parents’ addictions, may have contributed to the development of these traits.
Therapists stress that trauma, like NPD and other personality disorders such as borderline personality disorder, can play a significant role. Narcissists often see themselves as victims, which helps them gain sympathy and adoration. However, it’s crucial to recognize that individuals who have experienced trauma are the true victims.
The aftermath of trauma, whether from a tumultuous childhood involving substance abuse or the loss of a close friend to violence, can leave a person emotionally fragile, making them more susceptible to criticism. To protect themselves, they may construct an inflated sense of self and struggle to empathize with others. The cause of NPD remains unclear, with questions surrounding intergenerational trauma, birth trauma, or factors unrelated to trauma.
Jada’s close friendship with Tupac Shakur during high school has also drawn attention. While it is unclear whether their relationship was romantic, Jada refers to Tupac as her soulmate. Will has expressed feelings of inadequacy due to Tupac’s influence, describing himself as a coward. Additionally, Jada admitted to being romantically involved with singer August Alsina during the separation.
Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be akin to being part of a cult. Narcissists use tactics like love-bombing, showering their partner with gifts, adoration, and intense affection to foster dependence. This phase often transitions into manipulative behavior, causing the non-narcissist to question their self-worth. Kimberly Anderson, a licensed marriage and family therapist, likens it to a cult dynamic.
Despite public declarations of love and admiration, Jada and Will’s separation since 2016 came as a surprise to many. Non-narcissistic partners often feel debased and struggle with their narcissistic partner’s lack of accountability. MacNair highlights the narcissist’s tendency to shift blame, highlighting their refusal to take responsibility for their actions.
It’s essential to differentiate between individuals with general mental health issues, who are more harmful to themselves, and those with personality disorders, who pose a greater risk to those around them. NPD is just one of the ten conditions that can lead to distorted thinking and behavior. Individuals with NPD have a grandiose sense of self and a distorted perception of the world.
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