I was born in 1969 and I have strong opinions about generations. For instance, why do millions of people watch ‘The Notebook’ repeatedly and then complain about it? It’s baffling to me. And why is there even a debate about using phones in movie theaters? The answer is clearly no. And why is it that Eric Clapton is still touring while Sinead O’Connor and Kurt Cobain are no longer with us? As film critic A.S. Hamrah once asked me, it just doesn’t make sense.
These are just my thoughts, but recently, I’ve come to realize that generational discourse is as useful as astrology. However, I’ve encountered a crisis that has made me question this belief – people are being mean to me.
I received some tweets/posts on X (formerly known as Twitter) from a Gen X-er who claimed that Gen X sucks and that we are terrible leaders with no empathy for younger generations. It seems like everyone agrees that Gen X is the worst. I reached out to my millennial friend Sarah to get her thoughts on baby boomers and Gen X. Her response was disheartening as she said, “Boomers know they’re lame, but Gen X is lame and thinks they are cool.”
This negative feedback was unexpected, but I didn’t let it bother me too much. I realized that people thought I was trying to be cool when I’m actually not. I contacted some friends in their 50s to gauge their reactions to the hatred towards Gen X. My friend John Gilman’s response was typical, as he said, “No one hates me more than I hate myself.” I too was accustomed to insulting myself, so I didn’t let the criticism affect me.
I planned to speak to Mr. Hamrah about this issue, but before I could, he texted me the devastating news of Sinead O’Connor’s passing. The news hit me hard, and both Mr. Hamrah and I expressed our sadness over her death and the cruel times we live in. We also found humor in the tweet about Gen X and our supposed high-income jobs. I shared my experience as a freelance writer, earning less than half of what I did at 30. Mr. Hamrah shared similar figures from his own career. I asked him if he noticed the rise of Gen X as the target of insults from millennials and Gen Z on X and various articles. I theorized that it might be challenging for younger generations to insult Gen X because we already have a fair share of self-hatred. Mr. Hamrah rejected my theory, stating that it was more like self-deprecation or low self-esteem for Gen X. He made a crucial point that people are confusing Gen X with boomers, which is tragic for us. He even mentioned someone calling Marilyn Manson and Kurt Cobain boomers, and we found it amusing.
I shared Mr. Hamrah’s rejection of my theory with my friend John, who still stood firm in his self-hatred. Then, I reached out to Dezeraye Bagalayos, a 45-year-old involved in community development and water advocacy. She shared her perspective on the growing hatred towards Gen X, highlighting their involvement in social and political movements. She believed that younger generations were unaware of Gen X’s contributions due to the education system, media, and politics. We also discussed the criticism of Gen X being apathetic or cynical. She attributed this sentiment to millennials holding onto the hope and change promises from the Obama era while Gen X quickly saw the reality. We shared a laugh about Marilyn Manson being mistaken for a boomer.
I also spoke to Aaron Thorpe, a 32-year-old podcast host, who found my friend Sarah’s comment about Gen X and boomers accurate. He explained that younger generations were more focused on the loss of social programs, retirement security, and affordable housing, rather than the differences between generations. He acknowledged their bitterness towards older people but emphasized that blaming older generations or expecting younger ones to fix everything was unproductive. He highlighted that capitalism concentrated power and wealth in the hands of a few, and it only became worse over time.
Lastly, I sought a psychoanalytic perspective from Patrick Blanchfield and Abby Kluchin, hosts of the “Ordinary Unhappiness” podcast. They agreed that being called a Gen X loser didn’t affect me as much because it lacks a deeper psychological impact. They brought forth the idea that generational differences and the blame game overlook the larger systems at play, such as capitalism and concentration of power.
Overall, my interactions with others and their perspectives have helped me realize that generational discourse is not the most useful way to interpret the world. It’s essential to focus on addressing systemic issues rather than blaming or expecting certain generations to fix everything.
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