Jessica Bengston, the regional executive chef at Terrain Cafe in Westport, Connecticut, reflects on her experiences as an LGBTQ chef in the hospitality industry. Born in Danbury, Connecticut, Bengston grew up in Westerly, Rhode Island, and began working in restaurants during her teenage years. In this edition of Voices in Food, Bengston discusses the rise of LGBTQ chefs in Connecticut, the impact of discriminatory laws on the hospitality industry in other cities, and the importance of creating inclusive kitchens.
The hospitality industry welcomes individuals from all walks of life, including different nationalities, religions, and sexual orientations. It’s a diverse melting pot where people with opposing backgrounds come together. Working in a kitchen is akin to being part of a sports team – you practice, prepare, and experience wins and losses together. Luckily, I personally haven’t encountered any homophobia in the kitchens where I’ve worked.
However, it wasn’t until my job at The Granola Bar in Westport that I began working with people who were not only straight men. The differences were stark. At 25, I found myself working alongside men who were much older than me. The conversations in the kitchen were often sexist. Being a lesbian, some men treated me as “one of the guys.” Interestingly, I found it more challenging to be a woman in a kitchen than an LGBTQ person. It wasn’t until I hired another female cook that I truly worked with someone like me.
In the later part of my career, I have been fortunate enough to create a kitchen atmosphere that reflects myself and my experiences. I was mindful of establishing a structure that promotes positivity and calmness. Generally, women in kitchens exude more positivity and awareness of their environment. I compare working with women to conducting or listening to a symphony, while working with men can sometimes result in more chaos.
These differences play a role in how chefs manage the younger generation. As their leader, I have to reflect on what changes I can make within myself to accommodate their needs. Work-life balance is crucial to them, and they no longer see working excessive hours as an accomplishment. Fair wages and safe environments are also important to them and their communities.
Sadly, I hear stories of people leaving certain states because they fear for their safety. A trans friend of mine recently left Florida due to this concern. States like Texas and Tennessee have vibrant food scenes, and people are faced with difficult decisions. Although I live in a “progressive” state, there are pockets where the political scene is vastly different. People often believe that things have changed, but they are naive. As proof, I recently had a neighbor insult me with a derogatory term.
Life-and-death situations affecting the LGBTQ community are happening across the country, and it’s a luxury to ignore these challenges. Some brave individuals live their lives fearlessly, disregarding the consequences. I look up to those who stay in or move to LGBTQ-unfriendly states. While I don’t consider myself on the front lines of the gay community, I strive to create a safe space in my kitchen and for my guests.
Although the restaurant industry is generally progressive, there is still work to be done to ensure a healthier environment. Mental health initiatives need to be at the forefront, considering the historical disadvantages faced by women, minorities, and the LGBTQ community. It was almost impossible for individuals from these groups to see themselves in higher positions. Today, some of the best female chefs I know are members of the LGBTQ community. They have overcome adversity and are thriving. It’s a diverse and dynamic group. In my own restaurant, I have received numerous resumes from women, and we have three LGBTQ individuals among our staff at Terrain. If I had seen a lesbian chef when I was growing up, I would have eagerly interned for them.
I admire chefs like Renee Touponce, a James Beard-nominated chef in Mystic, Connecticut, and Emily Mingrone, a chef in the New Haven area. They represent the best of LGBTQ chefs who not only think outside the box in terms of their cuisine but also in their approach to the hospitality industry. As chefs, we must evaluate our impact on our communities. Are we involved? Are we hiring diverse teams? And most importantly, are our employees happy and protected?
By prioritizing inclusivity and diversity, we can create a stronger and more welcoming culinary industry. It’s time for progress in mental health initiatives and for everyone in the industry to feel represented and valued.
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