Apocalyptic Raider Reveals How Cybertruck is Essential for Survival in the Future

The World Ends, The Cybertruck Survives: How Buying This Tesla Saved My Life

My name is Steve, and to me, the world is a chaotic mix of sparks and blood. Once, I was just a mere blogger, a keyboard warrior seeking a noble cause. Then the world crumbled around us, shattering us in our own unique ways. But at least I managed to get my hands on the Tesla Cybertruck before everything spiraled into chaos, and it’s been a game-changer for my wasteland raids.

Tesla’s Cybertruck Has Finally Arrived

Before doomsday arrived, Elon Musk designed the Cybetruck as the ultimate apocalypse vehicle. It’s rumored to be almost bulletproof, somewhat seaworthy, and able to withstand baseballs hurled by anyone but the strongest high school freshmen. The concept of the sea may have diminished, but for our baseballs and bullets, the sense of security this truck provides during my looting expeditions is invaluable. Amidst my ammunition and tools, space is limited for essential survival resources.

A normal day in the obscure remnants of New-New-Burlington, Vermont
Photo: Tesla

The Cybertruck is a major advantage in my post-apocalyptic raids. The History Men speak of something called “gasoline” used to power vehicles, which is long extinct. However, for me, that’s a non-issue as salvaged solar panels from old calculators provide the energy I need. The electric motor noiselessness is worth the trade-off, aiding my stealthy approach to communes giving away supplies. Regardless, as a rugged individualist, I shun everyone’s offers of help.

Photo: Tesla

The Cybertruck convoyed unmatched speed when it debuted, even surpassing something called a “Porsche.” Although mine is an older model, it’s still faster than foot travel, precluding the need to walk— unless it’s through those narrow East-side rocks that the truck can’t squeeze in between.

Photo: Tesla

Unfortunately, I need to cut this short. The surrounding marauders are back again, but this time I’m considering swallowing my pride and asking for help, because the Cybertruck’s bed isn’t opening from the inside. Just this one time.


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