In an article for New York, Allison P. Davis addresses the divide that often occurs among friends when some have children and others do not. Davis, who has chosen not to have kids, reflects on how her close friendships have been affected by this life choice. She acknowledges that both sides often reduce the other to stereotypes, with parents being seen as frazzled and boring, and non-parents being labeled as self-absorbed and entitled.
Davis explores how slights and misunderstandings can build up between friends in different life stages. However, she remains hopeful, noting that there are ways to bridge the gap and maintain meaningful friendships. She shares the story of a Brooklyn father who invites friends over to help with bedtime and spend time together afterward. While some friends may feel uncomfortable with this invitation and distance themselves, those who choose to participate experience a deeper level of intimacy and connection. Davis also recounts attending a birthday party for friends with and without kids, emphasizing that although compromises were made and not everyone got exactly what they wanted, they still found a way to enjoy each other’s company. The article encourages open communication and commitment as essential for preserving friendships amidst life changes. Read the full story. (Or check out other Longforms.)
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