Scientists at the University of Colorado Boulder have debunked the notion that opposites attract in relationships. In a study that analyzed over 130 personality traits across millions of couples, researchers found that couples were more likely to have similar traits than different ones. The study looked at various traits, including political and religious attitudes, level of education, intelligence measures, substance use habits, height, weight, medical conditions, and more. The researchers discovered that for 82-89% of traits analyzed, partners were more likely to be similar. Only 3% of traits showed a tendency for individuals to partner with those who were different from them.
The team found that the trait for which couples were most likely to be similar was their birth year. Other traits that showed similarities between partners included chronotype (whether someone is a morning person or a night owl), tendency to worry, and hearing difficulty, although these correlations were relatively small.
Lead author Tanya Horwitz suggested that these findings indicate that there may be mechanisms happening behind the scenes of relationships that we aren’t fully aware of. People may be attracted to those who are similar to them, or they may become more similar over time. However, there could be long-term consequences, such as the potential for height extremes if short people continue to have children with short partners and tall people with tall partners. Additionally, couples who share a similar educational background could inadvertently contribute to widening socioeconomic divides.
The study challenges the common belief that opposites attract and provides insights into the dynamics of human relationships. Celebrities like Kristen Stewart and Courteney Cox, who are known for dating partners who resemble them, further support the idea that people are more inclined to date those who resemble themselves. The phenomenon may be rooted in familiarity or kinship, as seeing someone who looks like us may spark a sense of familiarity.
While some previous studies suggested that couples start to look more alike over time, a more recent study from Stanford University found that spouses’ faces tend to be similar to begin with. This suggests that couples may have inherent similarities from the start rather than morphing into each other over time.
Overall, the study emphasizes the importance of understanding the underlying mechanisms that drive partner selection and relationship dynamics. By gaining insights into these factors, we can better understand why couples tend to have similar traits and potentially address the long-term implications of these similarities.
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