Hosting the perfect dinner party requires careful planning and consideration, and according to social interaction expert Professor Robin Dunbar, the ideal number of guests is a multiple of four. This is because four is the maximum number of people who can successfully maintain a conversation at the same time. The “rule of four” can be observed in everything from Shakespeare plays to films like Sex and the City and Love Actually.
Professor Dunbar, author of The Social Brain, explains that the reason for the conversational limit is due to our ability to only keep in mind five people’s mental states at once, including our own. Attempting to have a conversation within a larger group is likely to result in one or two people dominating the conversation, while others wait for a chance to break away into a smaller huddle.
Therefore, inviting four people, or multiples of four such as eight or twelve, to a dinner party is the best strategy for ensuring everyone has a good time. Shakespeare often involved four people in a conversation, allowing viewers to follow the maximum of five mental states that can be kept in mind.
While there is some flexibility to the rule of four, Professor Dunbar emphasizes that conversations tend to break up when a fifth person joins. His studies have verified the conversational limit in various settings, including footpaths, restaurants, and pubs. In addition, people rarely laugh together in groups larger than four people.
Ultimately, understanding the rule of four can help hosts plan successful dinner parties and ensure that guests have a memorable experience.
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