According to new research from Abertay University in Dundee, one of the most significant milestones in a relationship is saying ‘I love you’. The study found that men are more likely to confess their love first, with an average of 107 days (3.5 months) into the relationship. Women, on the other hand, tend to wait slightly longer, confessing their feelings after an average of 122 days (four months).
The study, which involved 3,109 participants from various countries including Australia, Brazil, Chile, Colombia, France, Poland, and the UK, aimed to understand the average time it takes for people to say ‘I love you’ in different cultures. Participants were asked to complete online questionnaires about their love confessions, including the timing of when they started thinking about saying it, when they actually said it, and when their partner said it.
The results showed that across six out of seven countries, men were more likely to confess their love first. Men typically thought about saying ‘I love you’ 69 days (2.2 months) into the relationship, while women considered it after 77 days (2.5 months). However, when it came to actually saying it, men confessed their love after 107 days on average, which was 15 days quicker than women.
Interestingly, the study also found that the attachment style of individuals played a role in their reaction to hearing ‘I love you’. Participants with an ‘avoidant’ attachment style, characterized by a tendency to distance themselves in relationships, were less happy to hear the confession. Conversely, those with an ‘anxious’ attachment style, who are more preoccupied with their partner’s responsiveness, were more happy to hear it.
These findings align with a study from Michigan State University, which showed that matching personalities are not crucial for long-lasting love. The study examined how five big personality traits, including emotional volatility, open-mindedness, compassion, extroversion, and conscientiousness, affected relationship satisfaction. While similarities between partners were found to be attractive, they were not essential for lasting love.
Overall, these studies shed light on the dynamics of saying ‘I love you’ in relationships and highlight the role of gender and attachment styles in this milestone. It’s important to note that everyone’s journey is unique, and the timing of expressing love may vary from couple to couple.
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