Melissa Jeanne D’Andrea had already envisioned a future with Karissa Heleene Sullivan even before they crossed paths. “I picked out our wedding hashtag before our first date,” shared Ms. D’Andrea. Their chosen hashtag, #issawedding, cleverly combined both their names.
Their journey began on October 4, 2021, when they matched on Her, a dating app for individuals who identify as lesbian, bisexual, nonbinary, or queer. From that moment on, they engaged in daily texting and phone conversations, building a connection before their first official meeting.
At the time, Ms. Sullivan resided in Nyack, N.Y., while Ms. D’Andrea lived in the South Bronx. They agreed to meet at The Grille, now known as Farm, at Hotel Nyack, on October 8, 2021. The chemistry between them was undeniable. As they got to know each other, they discovered shared interests in literature, particularly books like “For White Folks Who Teach in the Hood … and the Rest of Y’all Too” by Christopher Emdin and “Pushout: The Criminalization of Black Girls in Schools” by Monique W. Morris. They both held deep convictions about educational reform, racial justice, and LGBTQ+ rights.
Interestingly, despite never residing in states associated with their favorite NFL teams, they found common ground in their support. Ms. Sullivan cheered for the Philadelphia Eagles, while Ms. D’Andrea rooted for the New Orleans Saints.
Just a day after their first meeting, Ms. D’Andrea playfully suggested attending a Saints and Eagles game in Philadelphia on November 21. In response, Ms. Sullivan texted, “I think I’m in love,” and promptly purchased tickets for the game, which was six weeks away.
Their connection continued to grow, and three days later, Ms. Sullivan invited Ms. D’Andrea to a panel discussion for National Coming Out Day. They then visited Pickwick Bookshop in Nyack together. Subsequently, they found themselves engaged in daily phone conversations and texts.
Soon, Ms. D’Andrea practically lived at Ms. Sullivan’s place in Nyack. The comfort they felt around each other was reminiscent of being at home, despite not explicitly discussing exclusivity.
However, on November 18, Ms. Sullivan decided to make their relationship official in her own unique way. She sent Ms. D’Andrea a photo of herself dressed in a suit for work with a message declaring, “You have the sexiest girlfriend ever.” Although Ms. D’Andrea remained composed and didn’t respond, she couldn’t hide her excitement.
After four months, Ms. Sullivan purchased an engagement ring. Originally planning to organize a grand event in the following spring or summer, she kept the ring a secret. However, one day, on March 3, 2022, Ms. D’Andrea jokingly teased Ms. Sullivan about when she might propose. To everyone’s surprise, Ms. Sullivan revealed she had something for Ms. D’Andrea in her backpack.
Ms. D’Andrea confessed that although they were on the same wavelength, she never expected a proposal in March. She playfully remarked that Ms. Sullivan was proposing just to spite her. Ms. Sullivan’s gesture left Ms. D’Andrea in shock, as she presented her with the exact ring Ms. D’Andrea had mentioned wanting. Overjoyed yet slightly annoyed that she hadn’t gotten her nails done, Ms. D’Andrea’s reaction was a mix of happiness and astonishment.
Moving forward, their relationship followed a common lesbian narrative, despite it being uncharacteristic for them. Without even officially living together, they decided to take the leap and moved into an apartment in Nyack on June 1, 2022, where they now call home.
Ms. D’Andrea, a Brooklyn native, holds the distinction of being the first woman and lesbian executive director of PFLAG NYC, the founding chapter of the nation’s largest organization dedicated to supporting LGBTQ+ individuals and allies. She earned her bachelor’s degree in human services from the State University of New York Empire State College and is currently pursuing a virtual master’s in business administration at Thomas Edison State University in Trenton, N.J.
On the other hand, Ms. Sullivan, raised in Rockland County, N.Y., serves as an assistant principal in the East Ramapo Central School district. She also sits on the advisory board for Black, Indigenous, and people of color at the Phyllis B. Frank Pride Center of Rockland County. In addition, she had the honor of being the inaugural grand marshal for the 2023 Rockland County Pride Parade. Ms. Sullivan holds a bachelor’s degree in exercise science and physical education from Brooklyn College, a master’s in adolescent special education from Hunter College, and a master’s in education leadership from Teachers College, Columbia University. Currently, she is pursuing her doctorate in education leadership from Columbia.
The couple’s wedding took place on July 29 at Hotel Nyack, the very site of their first date. The ceremony was officiated by Ms. D’Andrea’s former pastor, Rev. Tabatha Holley, who obtained ordination through the Fellowship of Affirming Ministries. Notably, the couple incorporated the tradition of jumping the broom, along with readings from “The Little Prince” and a poem by Rudy Francisco, a renowned slam poet. Their wedding ceremony was described by many as the most beautiful and intentional they had ever witnessed, embodying a vision of an ideal world.
In conclusion, Melissa Jeanne D’Andrea and Karissa Heleene Sullivan’s love story is filled with serendipity, shared interests, and a deep connection. From their first encounter on a dating app to their unforgettable proposal and eventual marriage, they have built a unique and inspiring relationship that continues to grow.
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