Looking back at old photos of myself from 20 to 30 years ago, I am now realizing that I didn’t fully appreciate how good I looked. In my younger years, I never hesitated to wear short skirts and dresses. But now that I’m in my early 50s, I find myself deeming some of my closet items as “too short.” This made me ponder the question: How short is too short for someone who is over 50? Does it differ from when I was 22? Should it be any different? Furthermore, how have my style and fashion choices evolved as I’ve aged?
These inquiries sparked my interest in exploring the answers, if there were any, and whether they even mattered. I decided to speak with as many women in my age group as possible, and I even sought insights from a psychologist. The stories and conversations I encountered were enlightening, validating, and incredibly insightful.
One of my long-time friends, Natalie Flores, who is 49 years old, shared her experience with me. We worked together in our 30s and bonded over short skirts, tank tops, and cowboy boots in Austin, Texas. However, Natalie mentioned that she no longer wears shorts due to the way they highlight the curve of her inner thighs. On the other hand, she feels comfortable wearing short skirts as they cover this area. Additionally, she avoids cap sleeves because they draw attention to her soft and pale inner arms, which she prefers to conceal.
Joan, a 69-year-old cyclist and retired lawyer, also shared her shift in fashion choices. Since turning 50, she no longer wears miniskirts because she no longer feels the need to showcase that much of herself. As she got older, she decided to steer clear of skirts altogether, as they were inconvenient when dropping something or climbing over objects, which happened frequently in her 40s and 50s.
Stephanie Ruksyio, a stylish French woman in her 50s whom I met years ago, conveyed that her fashion choices have definitely transformed over time. She emphasized that she is continuously evolving in both fashion and other aspects of her life. This perpetual growth and becoming is something we should all strive for. After all, are we ever truly finished evolving?
Stephanie expressed, “The wonderful thing is now I don’t have any pressure or drive to impress. My fashion and style decisions have gradually become comfortable yet funky, but above all true to myself, instead of hypothetically pleasing the times and/or people. I feel and love my age in the sense that I dress completely in tune with my needs and wants, regardless of exterior inputs.”
Some of the women I spoke to expressed concerns about their aging skin. Joan mentioned that despite her good muscle tone and overall fitness, she grapples with sagging. She somberly acknowledged that gravity has been around as long as she has, and this fact breaks her heart. Similarly, Jeannie Barbato, an active 70-year-old, admitted that she is more conscious of showing skin due to wrinkles and scars. However, this doesn’t deter her from embracing her choices.
To gain insight into the psychology behind these experiences, I consulted Ann Kearney-Cooke, a licensed psychologist and wellness coach. She stressed that if one’s self-esteem heavily relies on their appearance, aging can cause increased anxiety as physical changes occur. This is particularly true for women. However, Kearney-Cooke suggested that defining oneself based on daily choices, such as being a better person, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, engaging in artistic experiences, and so on, can help alleviate such anxiety.
She emphasized the importance of focusing on choices that make us feel good about ourselves and our bodies. It’s crucial to remember that we are affected by various factors, such as personal relationships and societal expectations. However, the key is to find colors, fabrics, and styles that not only look good on us but also genuinely express who we are in the present moment.
As we age, there is a certain liberation in caring less about others’ opinions of our appearance. While I may still have moments of concern, I have become better at disregarding those worries. One respondent to my miniskirt question aptly stated, “No worries. No fear. I wear what I want.” Realizing that not everyone is fixated on us offers a newfound freedom. Jeannie mentioned looking at women her age and realizing that nobody really cares about how they dress, which brings her a sense of carefreeness.
Natalie recently experienced nostalgia for her college years’ style and questioned whether she was trying too hard to appear young. She started incorporating elements of that look into her fashion choices. However, she couldn’t help but wonder if it seemed forced or out of touch with what someone her age is “supposed” to wear.
It’s common for many of us to spend a significant amount of time worrying about our appearance and whether we are attractive to others. This concern is deeply connected to how we choose to dress and our relationship with our bodies. Kearney-Cooke emphasized the need to teach others how to discuss our bodies respectfully.
She shared a story about a client whose doctor confirmed her good health. When she told her husband, he questionably asked if the doctor had commented on her “big butt.” However, the client ingeniously responded, “No, he didn’t ask about you.” This anecdote highlights the importance of maturity and acceptance that comes with aging.
As Stephanie beautifully put it, “It’s a hard-won freedom to disregard how one is perceived by others. And I, for one, am so grateful to all who were pioneers in carving the road to openly expressing oneself unapologetically.”
Joan also reflected on her younger self, realizing that she didn’t fully appreciate her own beauty during those years. She expressed a wish to have stressed less about her appearance.
In conclusion, exploring the changes in style and fashion choices as we age can be a thought-provoking experience. It allows us to reflect on our past selves and appreciate our present growth. Ultimately, the journey of self-expression and self-acceptance should be guided by our own desires and needs, rather than external influences. And with age comes the wisdom and courage to embrace who we truly are.
Denial of responsibility! VigourTimes is an automatic aggregator of Global media. In each content, the hyperlink to the primary source is specified. All trademarks belong to their rightful owners, and all materials to their authors. For any complaint, please reach us at – [email protected]. We will take necessary action within 24 hours.
