“I suppose I’ll freeze my eggs.” Maybe you’ve heard someone say this or said it yourself, expressing frustration or mock despair about the ticking biological clock. This sentiment is becoming more common as advancements in science allow women to “preserve” their fertility. While these words may sound flippant, egg freezing is an option that previous generations didn’t have, and it has fundamentally changed our view on fertility.
According to the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority, there has been a significant increase in UK women freezing their eggs, with experts suggesting that the pandemic and the accompanying anxiety played a role in this rise. Many women felt that their chances of conceiving were being compromised due to the “fertile window” being disrupted.
For those who can afford it, egg freezing is seen as a solution to fertility concerns (although it is not typically covered by the NHS, except in cases where medical treatments may affect fertility). It has become an option for women facing what is known as social or circumstantial infertility. These are women whose housing, career, or relationship circumstances make it challenging to have children.
Egg freezing offers women the opportunity to take control of their fertility and empower themselves by preserving their high-quality eggs before they diminish with age. However, some clinics have received criticism for giving patients false hope or a false sense of security, especially considering that success rates, particularly for women over 35, can be low.
However, most fertility clinics are transparent about the process. Dr. César Díaz-García, the medical director of IVI London, emphasizes the physical and mental challenges of the procedure along with the potential costs. At his clinic, a single cycle of egg freezing costs £3,295, without additional tests or treatments. The IVI website advises that women may need multiple egg-freezing cycles, especially if they freeze their eggs in their late 30s or early 40s when egg production and quality decline.
Dr. Díaz-García provides statistical data on the chances of success based on the number of frozen eggs. Women under 35 have a 16% chance of having a baby with five frozen eggs, which increases to 77% with 15 eggs and 95% with 25 eggs. For women over 35, the chances are 6% with five eggs and 50% with 20 eggs. The IVI guidance acknowledges that egg freezing doesn’t guarantee a baby and advises women to manage their expectations.
These odds may seem discouraging, but egg freezing is not a cure-all. However, as Emily, a 36-year-old who froze her eggs due to low egg reserve, explains, it can provide a sense of liberation. She underwent two rounds of treatment and retrieved 21 eggs, which she considers a solid insurance policy despite not knowing their quality. She emphasizes that fertility didn’t influence her recent breakup and she’s now more relaxed about her future in her mid- to late-30s. Emily believes that she has done everything she can, and the rest is up to fate.
The women I spoke to about egg freezing had mixed emotions. Emily found the treatment exhausting due to her chronic illness, while Amy, diagnosed with premature ovarian insufficiency, needed three rounds of treatment at a cost of over £20,000. Both acknowledged the mental toll and side effects associated with the process. Despite the challenges, Harriet, who had mixed results with egg freezing and found it invasive, still sees it as a viable option, albeit not without its difficulties.
The pressure surrounding fertility decisions can make it hard to choose a clinic that aligns with your needs. Fertility panic adds an additional layer of complexity, even when armed with all the necessary information. While there are no guarantees, having the means to freeze eggs offers a glimmer of hope. And for those who have experienced fertility panic, hope can be an invaluable commodity.
What’s working
I discovered Doddl cutlery for toddlers, and it has been a game-changer for my son who struggles to feed himself. The utensils are easy for him to grip, and mealtimes have become much faster. He still occasionally throws them on the floor, but at least more food is making it to his mouth.
What’s not
My work-life balance is currently lacking; it might never be the same again. The arrangement of three days of stay-at-home mothering and two days of nursery is leaving me feeling somewhat dissatisfied. While I adore spending time with my son at this age, I don’t think I’m cut out to be a full-time stay-at-home mother. Acknowledging this has helped me feel a little better about the situation.
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