For die-hard horror movie enthusiasts, no terrifying film can ever be too scary. But for those who are easily frightened, choosing the wrong horror movie can leave them feeling miserable. Luckily, Slate’s Scaredy Scale is here to assist. Our highly scientific and mostly spoiler-free rating system compares new horror movies to classics on a 10-point scale, taking into account different fears and preferences. Whether you’re terrified by jump scares, psychological terrors, or gory scenes, our scale breaks down each film’s frights based on suspense, spookiness, and gore.
In this assessment, we’ll be diving into Blumhouse’s new time-travel slasher for Prime Video, “Totally Killer,” directed by Nahnatchka Khan and starring Kiernan Shipka. Shipka plays teenager Jamie, who goes back in time to catch a mysterious murderer targeting her parents and their friends from the 1980s to the present day. With its nostalgic setting, comedic tone, and Halloween backdrop, “Totally Killer” is a perfect watch for spooky season. However, it’s important to note that the movie carries an R rating and features a significant body count.
Some have described “Totally Killer” as an “R-rated Disney Channel Original Movie,” which is a compliment in its own right. But is it geared towards a younger audience, or is it more reminiscent of the teen bloodbaths that have haunted generations? Let’s delve deeper into its scares and analyze it further.
Chart by Slate. “Totally Killer” photo from Amazon Content Services.
While any movie paying homage to ’80s horror is bound to have a few jump scares, “Totally Killer” keeps them to a minimum, occurring at predictable moments. It’s as suspenseful as one would expect from a film with a sardonic lead character who complains about missing Wi-Fi, others’ lack of understanding of consent, and the subpar quality of ’80s weed. In other words, it’s more amusing than nerve-wracking.
Chart by Slate. “Totally Killer” photo from Amazon Content Services.
Although “Totally Killer” may not be particularly frightening, it falls under the slasher genre, which means there’s plenty of slashing. The villain, known as the Sweet 16 Killer, is notorious for stabbing his victims 16 times. To its credit, the movie doesn’t always depict the actual act of stabbing on screen, often opting for suggestive shots. However, there are occasions where the audience is shown the killer in action, leaving behind bloody corpses once the job is done. Personally, I’m desensitized to gore, but the sounds of the killings still managed to make me cringe at times, even if the explicit act itself was hidden from view.
Chart by Slate. “Totally Killer” photo from Amazon Content Services.
A significant portion of “Totally Killer” is dedicated to poking fun at ’80s horror movies and ’80s culture in general. Jamie scoffs at the lack of school security and is handed a schedule just by claiming to be an exchange student. She hitchhikes with a stranger, a mother with young children, who smokes in the car throughout the entire ride. Jamie’s parents and their friends prioritize pot brownies and sex over the brutal deaths occurring around them. Additionally, the entire premise of the movie revolves around time travel. All of this is to say that the film doesn’t take itself too seriously. The lasting impression left by “Totally Killer” is the comedy, not the scares. However, the threat of a serial killer is still more grounded in reality than time travel, which earns this movie a modest 2 on our scale.
Chart by Slate. “Totally Killer” photo from Amazon Content Services.
“Totally Killer” is a delightful blend of traditional horror, meta humor, and ’80s nostalgia, sprinkled with some profanity. It’s more entertaining than hair-raising, which is great news for fans of Kiernan Shipka who may be accustomed to the milder shocks of “Chilling Adventures of Sabrina.” However, viewers who are afraid of blood or still haunted by ’80s fashion might need to occasionally cover their eyes.
Additional chart photos by PBS, Buena Vista Distribution Company, Warner Bros., Universal Pictures, Buena Vista Pictures, Paramount Pictures, New Line Cinema, Twentieth Century Fox, Fox Searchlight Pictures, IFC Films, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM), Lions Gate Films, Pixar, TWC-Dimension, and Sony Pictures.
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